Taking steps to change your life is like trying to pin the leaves back onto a tree, you need to get creative.

“I’m going to change my life!”.. Is what I said 8 years, 3 relationships, 5 jobs and 2 dogs ago. Where did I go wrong?

Photo by Nadine Shaabana on Unsplash

The thing to remember is you didn’t go wrong anywhere. You’re simply trying to mesh the logical side of your brain with the creative, and that can get tricky as it requires some blurring of the lines. And most of us, we’re just not so great at coloring outside those lines we’ve been taught to adhere to.

Here are the steps of successful change (as listed in Google):

1. Acknowledge and understand the need for change
2. Communicate the need and involve people in developing the change
3. Develop change plans
4. Implement change plans
5. Evaluate progress and celebrate success

Um… Ok. But in reality it goes a little more like this:

1. Realize there is something about your life you want to change
2. Ponder on social norms and try to figure out where you are lacking
3. Stumble into your personal empowerment and spend time finding your new path
4. Tell the world your new plan (Oh, and clue your immediate tribe in on how it might affect them!)
5. Research (my personal favorite step- I could get lost for years in this one, and sadly have a time or two)
6. Time goes by, life happens, priorities shift, interests grow.
7. Realize your original plan doesn’t quite fit anymore
8. Repeat steps 3–7, perpetually.

Here’s the thing though. That perpetual circle? That isn’t failure. That is EXACTLY what change is supposed to look like. It’s about re-evaluating, adjusting and trying again. Because you change from moment to moment. The person you are today is never going to exist again, it’s honestly a little exhilarating to look at it like that.

Go back, read that again.

You will never be this person again! EVER!

So take the time to explore what interests you today. You might not want to later. You might not be able to later. (for monetary or medical reasons)

Sure, I had a plan 8 years ago. I was going to build a tiny house on wheels and when my youngest graduated high school I was going to travel the country. Walk away from it all. Stretch my gypsy wings and go exploring. So I researched, I planned, I told the world. In the summer of 2019 I quit my job, became a Certified Nurse Coach, bought an old trailer, and started a remote job I could literally do while on the road from anywhere. I was in my glory. It was manifesting for me, until it didn’t.

Fast forward 6 months. The COVID pandemic hits the Midwest. I’ve given up my home in preparation for the road. 3 kids who were supposed to be in college suddenly need a place to stay- I need a place to stay. Yet- I had succeeded in some respects. I had left the job I loathed for one that meshed beautifully in this new pandemic world. I had also found a path to spreading empowerment to others (which literally stills brings me joy each and every day)

Now my circle of change might have restarted, but in retrospect it was exactly what I needed. I just didn’t know it at the time. That situation led us to move in with my grandmother. Which was tight and even uncomfortable at times, 5 adults and 3 dogs in a 900 sq ft house, but an experience I am eternally grateful for. I was able to spend precious time with her those last several months before she passed. Had I not needed to readjust I would have been out on the road. Missing those precious memories.

And now, 2 additional years later, I am still in her house. Slowly remodeling what I have inherited. Two young adults with me here. Yet we’ve acknowledged that since the pandemic started, we’ve grown closer. More intertwined. I no longer feel the draw to travel on my own. But we all still feel the pull to do something just a little different than what this Midwest suburb can add to our lives. And so the cycle starts once again. This time in unity. Blending into a multigenerational adventure.

I might not know what exactly it will look like just yet. It may be that family centered homestead. It may be maintaining a home base in my grandmother’s house and creating a separate sanctuary for all to go to when needed. Or maybe I’ll get lucky and it will be a combination of all of it (with my envisioned retreat center too!) But I still see forests and mountains and rivers in my mind’s eye. I want to be more connected to the earth. More connected to my family. More connected to being creative in finding myself daily.

So if you often wonder ‘How did I get here?’, know you are not alone. And whatever brought you to this moment was not wrong. You don’t owe anyone else an explanation for the steps you did or didn’t take. This life of yours only has to make sense to YOU! Get creative and sculpt a life all your own. Own your circle of change.

Arise WILD!

~Wild Serenity Healing